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Post by chasper jasper. on Jul 25, 2008 23:52:21 GMT -5
tag:; zoltin zerbest. Chasper walked out into the courtyard, humming a good song. She had a bit of a weakness for her music, especially her iPod. She took it everywhere she went and always made sure she had it with her. Except it didn't work at Hogwarts, so she just had to carry it around without using it. Which sucked so bad.
At the moment, her thoughts were on her chat with Max. They had been talking about how next year would be... how this would be their last year together in Hogwarts. It was a painful thought, a thought she could barely think about without bursting into tears. But that's why she was humming, to keep her happy and not so depressed. But she still felt that sickening feeling.
Chasper sighed as she mouthed the words to the song and looked around at all of the happy students. They were all happy to be around each other, but Chasper was a bit upset that the one best friend that she's ever had [ and may possibly love ] won't be there next year. She shook her head, trying to clear her mind, but there would always be something there to hurt her.
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Zoltin Zerbest
gryffindor
last in the alphabet, first to stand up
Posts: 84
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Post by Zoltin Zerbest on Jul 26, 2008 20:12:32 GMT -5
 .  .  +
troubles MELT LIKE lemon drops[/blockquote][/center][/font][/b] His father once told him that if he was more likely to get depressed if he didn't exercise, ate unhealthy foods, and lazed around. The more active you were and the fresher, brighter foods you ate, the happier you would be. Zoltin didn't ask questions, but took the knowledge as his own and tried to use it whenever he was down.
But it was hard to tell if such method would really improve a mood created by emotional events. Such as now, as it seemed, Zoltin was single. It felt odd knowing that, after so many years being hooked and assuming he would never be let go. Yet, they hadn't spoken since their 'date' and the way things ended...he was pretty sure Katrina broke up with him.
It wasn't as odd as it was painful. And the sting of the outdoor cold, that he'd ironically come to for healing, was worsening the situation. But at this point, either the pain or the cold would make him numb, so Zoltin decided there was no reason to go back inside. There was nothing for him there.
But there was in the courtyard, he was pleased to see. Chasper was humming as she walked around, but she didn't look all that happy. Maybe it was the couples, they were sure bothering him.
"Chasper Jasper," he called, dragging his feet over to her in a jog, "what brings you outdoors?"
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Post by chasper jasper. on Jul 27, 2008 0:26:34 GMT -5
Chasper was then interrupted by a familiar voice, "Chasper Jasper," Zoltin called, jogging over to her, except his jog was lifeless...
"Zoltin Zerbest," she replied, nodding once to acknoledge his presence, "what brings you outdoors?" he asked, sounding just as lifeless as his jog looked.
Chasper shook her head, "Just needed some fresh air, you?" she asked, her hands in her sweater pockets. She didn't feel like wearing her robe today, plus, all the classes were over for the day. It amazed her how she even had enough strength - or attention - to change out of her robes. Lately, ever since Max reminded her of their last year together, she'd been feeling quite dead. She just didn't feel happy or have enough energy to do anything anymore.
Another horrifying thought popped into her head: she had been walking in the halls a few days ago and walked past Katrina, now she didn't mean to do it, but she heard Katrina thinking about a little kiss she had with a guy named Chris. Chasper knew a bit about him, he was really close friends with Ryan, but they had never really had the time to talk. This thought made her look at Zoltin with apology in her eyes. If he knew, then it would really explain his... dead look. The loo kthat Chasper seemed to have as well.
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Zoltin Zerbest
gryffindor
last in the alphabet, first to stand up
Posts: 84
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Post by Zoltin Zerbest on Jul 27, 2008 2:12:57 GMT -5
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Post by chasper jasper. on Aug 3, 2008 0:15:20 GMT -5
"The same," he nodded, his gulp was pretty loud. Chasper winced when his thoughts were so strong that they just popped into her head. It wasn't fair to him to have to go through that. She wasn't sure about Katrina, though. She didn't know really anything about either of them, but she seemed to get along better with Zoltin. What confused her though, was that she didn't do anything to mess the relationship up... did she?
"What is it?" he asked, his head tilted. The pain shot through her once more, she hated seeing people in pain. Chasper looked down, "Well, I can never keep secrets well... and I'm guessing you already know," she lied a bit right there, she wasn't guessing at all, she knew, "But I noticed how you're not as... joyful," she looked up at him, sadly, quickly missing the happy Zoltin, "as you were before. And I also noticed what happpened between..." she choked at that point. It wasn't her relationship or something she should worry about, but being able to read someone's thoughts, you can really feel their pain and have so much sympathy for them. And she hated seeing someone upset. "Between..." she shook her head, not able to continue.
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Zoltin Zerbest
gryffindor
last in the alphabet, first to stand up
Posts: 84
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Post by Zoltin Zerbest on Aug 3, 2008 20:25:23 GMT -5
. . +
troubles MELT LIKE lemon drops[/blockquote][/center][/font][/b] "Katrina and me?" he finished for her, although not lightly and without depression coated around the words. He was a bit curious that she knew. Obviously something had happened how he was dragging himself around and not leaning onto Katrina for help. But how did she know what had happened, if she did? Chasper had only said she couldn't help but notice what had happened. Did Kat tell someone? Had someone been watching them? Was it true, then, were they broken up? Even now he wasn't entirely sure...
Maybe Chasper just meant how they were acting. That was probably it. He was getting over-analytical.
"She almost kissed someone," Chasper would probably be one of the few he told the story to; he trusted her. Not with not gossiping, he didn't quite care, and didn't believe anyone else really gave a hoot about their romantic life. It was still trust, but in the way where he felt that if he told her he was unhappy, she wouldn't judge him. Or...something... "And I could deal with that, but then I told her how I...how I sorta fancied you, in a totally non-threatening way. 'Cause you know," Zoltin brightened momentarily, "you're nice and your name is fun to say. Not like Kat...but then, then she didn't seem to get it..."
At this point, he was holding himself up by pressing against a tree with his palm. His legs had become very weak. And his throat was dry, cracking like an aged rock. "So she left, so I think...I think it's over...right now. It'll fix, I don't really see how life could go with us separate." Zoltin momentarily thought of life in the way future, with them living together and runts in his arms, teaching them cheering charms. It was too happy for his state.
"You noticed, huh? That obvious?" he choked a laugh, and then finally stated once again that, "It'll be okay. None of us actually did anything. And if we did, it would be okay in the end, anyway..."
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Post by chasper jasper. on Aug 4, 2008 10:48:24 GMT -5
"Katrina and me?" he finished for her, although not lightly and without depression coated around the words. Chasper nodded a little, he was starting to get curious - as his thoughts told her - which caused her to panic a little. No... don't panic, he wouldn't just start thinking about how maybe she can read minds, she would be able to hear him if he did. Oh, good God.
"She almost kissed someone," he explained, Chasper didn't quite catch that. She almost kissed someone? No... she did kiss someone, maybe Katrina just didn't tell him the whole story, "And I could deal with that, but then I told her how I...how I sorta fancied you, in a totally non-threatening way. 'Cause you know," Zoltin brightened momentarily, "you're nice and your name is fun to say. Not like Kat...but then, then she didn't seem to get it..." Chasper winced at what he said, wishing that it would all just stop.
"So she left, so I think...I think it's over...right now. It'll fix, I don't really see how life could go with us separate." she heard his thoughts about his future with Katrina and she winced once more.
"You noticed, huh? That obvious?" he choked a laugh, and then finally stated once again that, "It'll be okay. None of us actually did anything. And if we did, it would be okay in the end, anyway..." he added.
Chasper stared at him with wide eyes and shook her head, "No, no, no... oh no." she looked down at the ground as she shook her head, bringing her hand up to her forhead and smacking it, "Zoltin... oh God... Zoltin," she shook her head. Katrina must have almost kissed someone and then did kiss someone else. And... and Zoltin had no idea. Chasper grabbed his arm and gently pulled him to the ground, she knew that once she told him this bit of information, he would come crashing down.
"Zoltin... I really, really don't want to tell you this. You honestly have no idea how much I really don't, but I have no choice. It's either tell you and hurt you, but save you at the same time, or not tell you and hurt you even more when you find out." she sighed, looking him in the eyes and balling her hands up in her lap, "Well... Katrina almost kissed someone... like you said," she coughed, "But then afterwards... like, after she told you, I believe... and all of," she coughed once more, "this happened... she did... umm... kiss someone... else." Chasper explained, looking down and quickly regretting what she had just told him.
"He's umm... uh..." she sighed, squeezing her eyes shut as she kept looking down at the grass. Chasper gulped, "His name's Richard... Richard Channing." she paused, "Also known as Rick."
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Zoltin Zerbest
gryffindor
last in the alphabet, first to stand up
Posts: 84
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Post by Zoltin Zerbest on Aug 4, 2008 17:12:50 GMT -5
. . +
troubles MELT LIKE lemon drops[/blockquote][/center][/font][/b] "I know," his words quivered. Rick. Rickers. Rickles. Channingman. Man of many names. He had found out his secret and was outraged and hurt that Zoltin hadn't told him sooner. They were buddies after all, right? He'd tried explaining that, really, he wouldn't have anyone know if he could. But that was even worse. He was pretty sure they were ex-best friends, just like now Zoltin was now Katrina's ex. And the funny thing was that he knew, even now, that he wouldn't have broken things off. Or would he?
But Zoltin didn't have enough mind power and capacity to start analyzing situations that didn't occur.That was all at a loss to the burst behind his ribs and the tears falling down his face. It was like a mini-earthquake had shaken his entirety and shattered his focus, comprehension, and all these other words that he couldn't think of as his heart bled. That's what it felt like.
When Chasper started and told him that she had kissed someone afterward, it was like an edge piece of his heart shifted off the base, create a large cut. But he'd been able to concentrate to hear the rest. Now he wished he hadn't. A mini-explosion in the center and all sorts of open slits everywhere else.
Somewhere behind all the pain, he knew this wasn't as bad as it could be. Katrina could have gone much farther, she could've told Zoltin she hated him, she could have told him everything she'd ever said to him was a lie. Never loved him at all. He was sure then his whole body would break and he'd be shaking so much with all the tears that Zoltin wouldn't be able to hold anything, much less operate.
But it still wasn't a piece of cake. It was anything but, and so he continued to cry quietly beside Chasper. He'd always been told it makes you feel better, to cry and let it all out, but it was like he would never let it all out. Maybe it made it legal to kiss someone else when they were broken up, or whatever they were, but Kat still betrayed him. Trust was something of the past.
Zoltin clenched Chasper's hand as he lied his face against her shoulder. He couldn't seem to bring his own hands to his own face. "I'm sorry," he swallowed down a pack of tears, "I'm sorry. It just...just," Zoltin paused to regain himself. But when he did, when the tears stopped emerging momentarily, the pain magnified itself and they just started up again. "It hurts so much."
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Post by chasper jasper. on Aug 12, 2008 13:45:21 GMT -5
Chasper heard the pain in his thoughts, saw the pain in his face, and felt the pain radiating off of him and onto her. This whole day had come collapsing down and she had to pick it up before it could never be fixed again. Chasper felt so bad for Zoltin, his girlfriend and his best friend had betrayed him all in one day. How could any one person do that to someone? Just completely take all the happiness away and replace it with such sadness, such pain that there was really no getting out of it? It was horrible.
She could hear him try and make things better, but only seem to make things worse. It just kileld her to seem him fall so hard and she had no idea how to fix him. Make him all better again. There was nothing she could do, she could try all she wanted... but there was nothing for her to say or do to make him happy again. Unless... unless she pushed her way into this whole mess and pick up the peices that they couldn't pick up. She would hate herself for getting into something that she had no business getting into... but what would she rather have? For everyone to be happy again, or to have to watch everyone in such pain and actually hear them and their pain? Exactly.
When she saw more pain take over his body, she really started to regret ever telling him anything. Maybe it would have been better if he didn't know. Maybe him and Katrina would get through this and forgive each other. Maybe him not knowing the truth was better. Well, that was all a lie, now wasn't it? But sometimes it was better to not know the truth. And maybe right now was one of those times.
Now she could hear him talk about how much worse everything could be. Well, at least he knew that it's really not as bad as it seems. Things were a bit better now that she could see that it wasn't all that bad. Until he started thinking about how he would feel if it were much worse. Chasper wanted to smack herself for getting her hopes up.
That's when Chasper ntoiced that Zoltin was crying silently next to her. Chasper watched him, feeling so much more worse than she already was. Not only could she see his pain, but she could hear it as well. Hearing it and seeing it put together made her start to feel it. Which made her feel worse for him because she knew what he was going through and wanted it all to end for him. She didn't care if this made her feel worse, if it was making him feel worse then it just had to go. Seeing someone else in pain was way worse than being in pain, herself. Chasper was sort of like that, didn't put herself first half the time... most of the time.
Chasper felt Zoltin clench her hand and lie his head on her shoulder, soaking her shirt instantly. She didn't mind, just as long as he was starting to feel a little bit better then she was okay with the... wetness of her shirt. "I'm sorry," he apologized, "I'm sorry. It just...just," he paused and Chasper let him continue, watching as the tears were gone for a split second and then back once more; false hope. "It hurts so much." he finished, looking into her eyes.
Chasper's eyes started to water a bit as he said this. Wait, why was she starting to cry? Chasper shook her head and gave Zoltin a reassuring hug to hold him together, "No, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for telling you this when you were already feeling poorly." she apologized, the tears now burning her cheeks, "It's going to be okay, you're going to get through this, I promise."
Was that promise a lie? Was she just saying that to make him feel better, momentarily, and then have him break down once more when he realized that it wasn't going to be okay? No, she wasn't lying. maybe she was partly just saying that to make him feel better and have a little bit of hope. But only partly. The rest was complete truth, she would see to it that he got through this.
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